It is ok to feel awful! It is ok to feel rage! Just say “fuck it” to life and allow yourself to cool down for a while.
There are many things you can do that will be beneficial for you right now, the most important thing is to not beat up on yourself for feeling bad – allow yourself to feel as you do. Then distract yourself from the specifics that are causing you so much inner discord. Difuse, distract and go general about that topic.
When you have cooled down – and you will – then you can reach for a more reliefgiving perspective on the topic.