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When everyone asks you for money

This month I have help out three friends financially. It began two weeks ago with a friend who I love dearly – he didn’t have any money left so I took him to the store and let him pick out all the groceries he needed. It was a lot of fun helping him out with this. I have helped him out financially a lot the last 10 months.

A week after that a very close friend of mine had made some bad choices (bought a lot of clothes and things without thinking about what to do when he had spent all his money) and had no money left. I have chosen to help him out fincially for the rest of the month. I have helped him out financially for over 10 years.

And last night I received a text from a neighbour that I have only met twice (in August last year) who has two little babies, they asked if I could give them some money since they didn’t have any money left this month… it didn’t feel ok. I have given them money 4 times since August… but I thought about their two little babies and the thought of them not having any food made it easy for me to give them some money.

And why do I write about this? Because I feel I have reached a point where I have become a person who people come to when they need money. I don’t want to be that person anymore. Sure it is fun to be able to help so many people each month and still have a lot of money left for me and my babies… but I feel this is no longer the right way of dealing with these “friends”. They only become more and more dependent on me and my money. I want them to find their own freedom and empowerment, their own responsibility for their finances.

My intention for next month is clear. I know what my focus is. It is time for a change – and I will begin right now.

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Take care of yourself – be of most value to others

It all starts with you and how you feel. When you take care of yourself, when you show yourself love and appreciation and you value your emotions – now you will be of most value to others as well.

You will be more clear, more effective and of more value to those you interact with 🍀

Remember to relax and rest through out your day. Not just phtsically but mentally. It is so easy to get caught up in the desires and wishes of those around you at work and at home or to let your own demands on yourself get too heavy.

Remeber to pause and find your balance again. Stress is not good for your mind or your body. It is not worth it. Just pause, breathe and relax mentally. Look at it from a more general perspective and prioritise.

You have to value yourself and how you feel first. If you feel good you will be more clear, more effective and you will be of more value to those you interact with as well so it is a win win situation.

We need silence

“God is the friend of silence. See how nature – trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence… We need silence to be able to touch souls.”

Mother Teresa

Stuck in their own miserable way of thinking – they cannot hear your soothing words

Sometimes people (myself included) get so stuck in their own miserable way of thinking that they cannot even hear you when you try to sooth them into feeling better. They just keep asking the same old questions again and again, the words may be dressed differently but the core beliefs still shine through as bright as the full moon on a clear winter’s night.

No matter how many times and in how many ways you try to sooth them into feeling relief, they will not hear you. When they are so stuck in their own negative thinking they are not asking for your opinion or for a solution – even if they say they are wanting that – they are looking for confirmation and validation of their own misery. 

But don’t worry! This too shall pass, even for them. You are just not the path for them to take, right now. Don’t blame it on yourself if they cannot be soothed. Keep being the loving, caring being you are and know that they have all the guidance they will ever need within themselves. All they have to do is calm down, relax and be willing to let go of their own destructive thinking. One step at the time. Change starts within.

Inspire change with love and compassion

To strenghten another – know they have the strenght they seek within 

They CAN change their lives ❤

Save them all?

It is not your job to save them all, but you can be a beautiful,shining light of hope. You can love yourself and be the example of someone who lived throught it and managed to turn your life around.

Not everyone will see you, not everyone will care, not everyone will be inspired to change – but the best you can do is to continue to care about how you feel and reflect that stable love and care in your words and actions. 

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