Advertisements

Why would such a beautiful girl like me hate myself for over 30 years and have no self-esteem? Here is why:

I got such a brilliant question today and here is my answer:

I grew up with an alcoholic father and my parents mentally abused me. I was sexually abused when I was 6 years old by 3 older guys, I was bullied in school, had reading and writing difficulties, had no friends, developed anorexia (an eating disorder) when I was 9 years old, had no friends during my entire school years, was raped by two guys when I was 17, ran away from home two weeks after that because my father’s alcohol abuse was insane and my parents were so verbally mean to me, I ran straight into the arms of a guy who physically and mentally abused me for over two years until he was sentenced to prison for it. During this time my mother died. I had to go through the two trials all alone – I had no one. I was completely alone, no friends and no one in the world that I could talk to. I did not want to live anymore – I even tried to take my own life. Then my father died, I got pregnant and had to make an abortion…and the man of my dreams cheated on me and lied about it for over a year until the truth came out in the most painful way ever… somewhere there, around the age of 24, I decided that enough is enough and I chose to change my thinking. I started working on liking myself. I did it all by myself – I never told ANYONE about any of these things that happened to me in my childhood/teenage years. It was not until I was almost 30 years old I began talking about it.

So, I guess this answers your question on why such a beautiful girl like me, hated myself for almost 30 years and had absolutely no self-esteem 🤣❤

How you FEEL has nothing to do with the way you look. I had my desired, dream body, but I hated myself and had no self-esteem for almost 30 years. Beauty does not mean confidence. You cant see how you feel, it is 100% about your own thinking – and you CAN do something about that. If I could, all by myself, anyone can. 🌹❤

Advertisements

Take responsibility for how you feel?

“It is not you, it is me” – yes!!!! It is never the other person´s thoughts, words or actions that affect how you feel about them or about yourself – it is your own thoughts, words and actions that affect how you feel about them and yourself.

No one else can make you feel this way or that way without your consent – you are the one who chooses the perspective from which you view everything! So yes, you are actually in charge of how you feel and yes you are the only one who can change how you feel.

Of course others can inspire you to feel a certain way because of their actions and words – but ultimately you are the one who chooses. That is very empowering and very freeing to realize!

Now this is actually rather deep even though it seems so simplistic. One might argue that because of their partner`s actions they were left heart broken and insecure. True, it might feel that way. But, you can work on how you view what happens. Take cheating for example. Instead of letting it break you, you work on looking at it as an act from someone who didn´t really love you – then it is a good thing that you were made aware of this action so you can be more clear about what kind of relationship you want to be in. Do you really want to be with someone who hurts you? Is that really love? Perhaps you want to be with this person anyway and perhaps this action made this person more aware of how he/she wants to feel about you and how he/she wants your relationship to be like.

It is true that only good can come from any experience, but what is important is how you view what happened and the perspective you now choose to have. And you are in charge of that.

I have had enough – I set you free

Follow joypassiondesire on WordPress.com

Archives

%d bloggers like this: