Advertisements

Why would such a beautiful girl like me hate myself for over 30 years and have no self-esteem? Here is why:

I got such a brilliant question today and here is my answer:

I grew up with an alcoholic father and my parents mentally abused me. I was sexually abused when I was 6 years old by 3 older guys, I was bullied in school, had reading and writing difficulties, had no friends, developed anorexia (an eating disorder) when I was 9 years old, had no friends during my entire school years, was raped by two guys when I was 17, ran away from home two weeks after that because my father’s alcohol abuse was insane and my parents were so verbally mean to me, I ran straight into the arms of a guy who physically and mentally abused me for over two years until he was sentenced to prison for it. During this time my mother died. I had to go through the two trials all alone – I had no one. I was completely alone, no friends and no one in the world that I could talk to. I did not want to live anymore – I even tried to take my own life. Then my father died, I got pregnant and had to make an abortion…and the man of my dreams cheated on me and lied about it for over a year until the truth came out in the most painful way ever… somewhere there, around the age of 24, I decided that enough is enough and I chose to change my thinking. I started working on liking myself. I did it all by myself – I never told ANYONE about any of these things that happened to me in my childhood/teenage years. It was not until I was almost 30 years old I began talking about it.

So, I guess this answers your question on why such a beautiful girl like me, hated myself for almost 30 years and had absolutely no self-esteem 🤣❤

How you FEEL has nothing to do with the way you look. I had my desired, dream body, but I hated myself and had no self-esteem for almost 30 years. Beauty does not mean confidence. You cant see how you feel, it is 100% about your own thinking – and you CAN do something about that. If I could, all by myself, anyone can. 🌹❤

Advertisements

You are my perfect soulmate

Love NEVER hurts

Love does not hurt – insecurity does, sadness does, anxiety does, anger does, jealousy does… but LOVE only feels good.

When you feel love you feel utter bliss. You feel happy, free and empowered. Anything less than that is not love. Even if you blame the other person for how much you are hurting, it is blame, sadness and those other negative emotions you feel. Not love. Love only feels good.

You might temporarily be tuned out of the frequency of love – that is why it feels so bad, because you LOVE to love and you WANT to love. And when conditions turn up that makes it hard for you to feel love in your heart, of course it will feel bad! But the negative feeling is never caused by love. Ever.

There is an even better way to love someone than most people are practicing: to love unconditionally. If you can truly master this you will not be so easily swept off into jealousy, insecurity, anger, sadness or any other negative emotion you might be very used to fall back into. You will have a stable centre of love, you will see through the eyes of love and you will see value in every situation. Maybe not all the time, but you will easily get back into your place of love when you fall off. Most importantly – you will never blame any one else for how you feel – you will realize that how you feel is your job. Love is an inside job just like happiness. ❤

2 500 followers and 550 000 views on my blog ðŸ˜

My purpose with my blog is to share what I did to turn my life around. This is where I share my thoughts and my beliefs – all the things I wish someone had told me before all my difficulties began. ❤ I want you to know that no matter what you have been through in your life or how difficult it might seem at the moment, you CAN improve your thinking and therfore improve your entire life.

❤ Thank you all for liking, commenting and sharing my posts. ❤ It feels so good to write and post here, this is my safe haven, and it feels even better that so many of you feel inspired by my posts. 🌹🌹🌹

It is the answer to every problem and every challenge you are faced with â¤

Especially when you are going through a lot of difficulties. Maybe you have made some mistakes or you have some health issues – now is the time to be extra kind and loving towards yourself.

Show yourself unconditional love no matter what is going on around you and no matter what is going on with your own body. You could be far from the body you desire, your skin could be freaking out all over your face, you could be far from the beauty you want to experience – it does not matter. LOVE is the answer to every problem and every difficuly. Choose to look at yourself and everything else through eyes of love. Look for things you like in everyone – including yourself.

Beauty, happiness, satisfaction in life… it all starts with love, and it shines from within. Let your love radiate stronger and stronger with each passing day. Make every day a day to fall deeper in love with yourself and all of life. This is your life, you were created to be exactly as you are – and you are magnificent – of course you are loved and adored by all that is! It is time for you to embrace this love and allow yourself to feel it.❤❤❤

When he doesn’t text you back – find your own love first!

Never let your happiness depend on someone else! Free yourself from the limiting bondage of needing anyone else’s attention in order for you to feel good. You are enough on your own. You are beautiful, smart, loved unconditionally and worthy of all things you desire!!!

Find your own stability first, find your own love and happiness first and then let the interactions you have with others enhance how good you already feel. ❤

What if I fall in love with the right person at the wrong time?

rose-2850129_960_720

What if I fall in love with the right person at the wrong time? What if the one I am in love with is already in a relationship? What if I fall in love with someone else while I am married?

Love is beautiful. Love is such a strong, wonderful feeling. Anywhere you stand can be the perfect place to stand. Look around where you are and make peace with things as they are. Find the best feeling aspects about your situation and let those be your dominant points of focus as you think of your life.

It is not possible to be standing in a wrong situation – you are where you are and it has to be ok. You feel the way you feel and it has to be ok. Never judge yourself for feeling the way you do, allow yourself to feel all of your emotions and make the best of wherever you might be.

There is no such thing as a one and only true love – millions of people could be the perfect love for you. It all comes down to how you are choosing to view the other person. You can see the best or the worst in everyone. What you choose to focus on is what you notice more of.

You can’t miss your chance of true love because your chances and your opportunities are endless. Begin by making peace with where you are. It is ok, it is all right. You don’t have to make any life changing decisions – just make small decisions along your way that you line up with. Make the choices you make the right choices for you by focusing on the positive aspects. Anything you choose can be the best choice for you because the choice – or the person – is not what makes the difference. Your thoughts about your choices is what makes all the difference.

Someone who hurts you – a rare and precious treasure â¤

“To meet someone who really hurts you, is to meet a rare and precious treasure. Hold that person in high esteem, and make full use of the opportunity to eradicate your defects and make progress on the path. If you cannot yet feel love and compassion for those who treat you badly, it is a sign that your mind has not been fully transformed, and that you need to keep working on it with increased application.”

– Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche

❤ ❤ ❤

This is an interesting view on how to see your difficulties. Everything can be of value and everything can inspire you to become stronger as a person. You can find value in everything that happens to you – including the behaviour of others – especially those who treat you badly.

Those who love you and always approve of you and what you do don’t teach you to love unconditionally. They are just easy to appreciate and love because they act in loving ways. But those who behave in deterimental ways, they are your true inspirers and teachers of unconditional love and unconditional happiness. If you can find your way to love again and to feel happy again – even though they did this awful thing now you are free. You don’t need them to behave in ways that please you, in order to feel pleased. What an empowered gift! ❤❤❤

Take responsibility for how you feel?

“It is not you, it is me” – yes!!!! It is never the other person´s thoughts, words or actions that affect how you feel about them or about yourself – it is your own thoughts, words and actions that affect how you feel about them and yourself.

No one else can make you feel this way or that way without your consent – you are the one who chooses the perspective from which you view everything! So yes, you are actually in charge of how you feel and yes you are the only one who can change how you feel.

Of course others can inspire you to feel a certain way because of their actions and words – but ultimately you are the one who chooses. That is very empowering and very freeing to realize!

Now this is actually rather deep even though it seems so simplistic. One might argue that because of their partner`s actions they were left heart broken and insecure. True, it might feel that way. But, you can work on how you view what happens. Take cheating for example. Instead of letting it break you, you work on looking at it as an act from someone who didn´t really love you – then it is a good thing that you were made aware of this action so you can be more clear about what kind of relationship you want to be in. Do you really want to be with someone who hurts you? Is that really love? Perhaps you want to be with this person anyway and perhaps this action made this person more aware of how he/she wants to feel about you and how he/she wants your relationship to be like.

It is true that only good can come from any experience, but what is important is how you view what happened and the perspective you now choose to have. And you are in charge of that.

“What if my one true love leaves me?”

Then she was not your “one true love”. There are millions of people out there in the world who are looking for someone exactly like you! There is no such thing as only one “soul mate” or “the one and only” – you can have the most satisfying relationship, a relationship where you are both equally in love and finding eachother your soulmate, you can have that experience with many different people.

It is never too late, you are not a hopeless case. If it didn’t work out then you just havent met her yet.

But, do you know the best way to meet your soul mate? By working on how you feel! By falling in love with yourself. By caring about yourself and learning that you don’t need another person to be complete! You are already complete on your own. You don’t need another person to be happy – happiness is an inside job. You don’t even need another person to feel love – love is an inside job. And by always looking for the best in others, always focusing on what you like in others and by practicing unconditional love – now you are a match to true love and you will attract it.

Let the person you meet enhance how good, empowered and loving you already feel – and this will be the most satisfying relationship you have ever experienced!

Love does not diminish over time – love, joy, passion and desire gets stronger and more delicious over time. ❤

Previous Older Entries

Follow joypassiondesire on WordPress.com

Archives

%d bloggers like this: