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When your heart is full of sadness – how do you find relief?

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Some days I do not feel like doing anything other than being alone, in the dark. How do I deal with those days? I sooth myself in many different ways. One of my favorite ways of soothing myself is to eat something delicious. Therefore, I make sure to treat myself to something delicious often throughout my days.

Sometimes it makes me feel better to look at beautiful pictures of nature, rain, the ocean… or listen to my favorite soothing music during the breaks at work. At home I usually don’t have time to relax during the days because my little babies want to play with me all the time, which also makes it easier to distract myself from my own sadness. Seeing their cute, happy faces and hearing their eager voices always makes me smile.

The best time to sooth myself is at night when everyone else is sleeping. Then I just lie in bed, enjoy the stillness around me and let the darkness of the night embrace me and sooth me. I was alone with my emotional pain for so many years as I grew up, that my solitude has become my greatest comforter now. I turn inwards when I need a break.

  • How do you sooth yourself?
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Make peace with where you are, practice unconditional happiness and live as if this moment was your last β€

My babies love being close to me no matter what we do or where we are. It is not easy to try to take a break when I am with them πŸ˜…

Being a mom is teaching me how to feel good unconditionally, how to love unconditionally and how to make the most out of every moment.

I am choosing to make peace with where I am, give my babies as much unconditional love and appreciation as I can and live as if this day – this moment – was my last. ❀

1900 followers and 527 550 views β€β€β€

My blog is my safe haven. This is where I share not only my joy, my passion and my desires but also where I share what works for me and how I transformed my life.

I have been sexually abused multiple times, physically abused, mentally abused, had an alcoholic father, I had eating disorders, been bullied, my mother died when I was 18 and my father died when I was 24 years old… I hated myself for almost 3 decades and had no self-esteem… but managed to save myself by changing my thinking. Little by little, step by step. All by myself.

And I succeeded. I have a very strong self-esteem and I have manifested so many things around me that I love. My life continues to improve all the time. I have two babies that I love and adore, a job I love, a cozy big house, a nice car, the body of my dreams… but all those things are just bonuses. The really important thing is that I feel so much better. I no longer have the victim mentality but an empowered way of viewing life. I am not always on top emotionally – it is a never ending journey – but most of the time I feel really good. This blog is where I share what works for me and what I believe.

My blog now has more than 1900 followers and has had over 527 550 views. This is incredible. Thank you all for the love and appreciation you give me everyday. I truly value you all. I am so happy that you are with me and that you enjoy my blog, it means a lot to me. Thank you. ❀

Love your figure – but your figure is not the reason for your love! β€

Whatever your body shape, size and weight might be – practice loving yourself unconditionally. You are more than your body – you are endless and eternal.

The body you have been given this lifetime is your treasure. It is the body that has been your home since you were born and will be until you die – treat it with loving care. ❀

I celebrate my body. I celebrate my curves and edges. I have learned to love myself, my body and my personality, unconditionally. Was it easy? No! Has the love you feel or not feel for yourself to do with your body shape, size and weight? No! I hated myself the first 24 years of my life. I absolutely loathed myself – all aspects of myself. I had the same body shape, size and weight then as I do now.

It is not my body that makes me feel this way or that way – it is the thoughts and the perspectives I choose to view life from.

1800 followers!!! πŸ’–πŸŽ‰

Thank you, my dear readers! I just saw that 1800 people are following my blog and that I have over half a million views! This is awesome.

I am so passionate about sharing what works for me and how I turned my entire life around. It is such a beautiful bonus to see that so many people enjoy reading my posts as well. Thank you. πŸ’–

I will not give up πŸŒΉ

Somedays I just want to stay at home, in bed, in the darkness, alone. But, I will not give up. I can do this – I am heading for work anyway. ❀

I wish you a nice day ❀

Darkness is my safe haven

Protected by darkness… soothed by the shadows… embraced by the night… this is my safe haven.

When my whole world is shattering around me

Where do I find my relief when it feels like my whole world has shattered around me? In the comforting darkess of the night… in the soothing cool rain… in the quiet stillness of the night… that is where I find my relief, my air, my soothing. That is where I find my balance again.

Only 17 years upon this earth ❀ – life is so much more than all the external things

Many years ago a student I cared for a lot decided to end his life. I had alerted the principal almost a year before it happened that this boy was not feeling alright. They did everything they could for him. I cared for him a lot and the last 6 months my class was the only class he came to. He really liked me and I felt he truly respected and appreciated me.

My last memory of him was an afternoon just before a holiday. He came up to me and asked me if he could speak to me, privately. I said “of course” and we went into an empty room next to the school library. We sat there and spoke for a while. I could tell he was going through a lot of mental challenges and that he was very depressed. But some how I felt hopeful about him as I spoke to him. His last words to me before he left was “Can I get a hug?” And I replied “Of course you can!” And then he hugged me for a long time before he left. I never saw him again. About a week after that I got a call from the principal and she told me he had committed suicide a few hours before she called me. It brought me to my knees. The emotional pain was unbearable.

It was millions of times worse than any other loss I had ever experienced before. My mom died from cancer when I was 18 and my father died from a heart attack when I was 24 – but this was more heart breaking somehow. This beautiful, brilliant, talented and kind student had only been living 17 years upon this earth – and had already decided to end his life.

It took me a lot of time before I could move beyond the emotional pain and make peace with his choice. I believe he was in a lot of mental pain during the most part of his life. He had talked to professionals several times about how he felt, he had been given anti-depressants for a long time… but nothing he did truly brought him lasting relief. I know he had taken drugs and done other destructive actions in order to sooth himself… but nothing really helped him. He was lost in his own despair – and this was his way out of his pain.

I do believe in life after death. I do believe we are all good and loved and eternal. I do believe he found relief. I feel that he appreciates what I did for him and I know I will meet him again.

His death taught me that life is so much more than everything you do, than your age, than your friends, than your family, than your experiences. What matters most in life is not any of the external things but how you feel within. ❀

You will forever be in my heart ❀

The most important question in life β€

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