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The fear I felt froze every inch of my body, but you didn’t even hesitate

I cared about you and yet you took my kindness and my trust and shattered it into millions of pieces.

Your arms and hands were so strong, I didn’t have a chance. The pain and all the bruises you left on my body were nothing compared to the utter powerlessness I felt when tried to pull your hands away from my body, when I looked into your eyes and I begged you to stop, when I said no and you just put your cold hand firmly over my mouth… Then you did exactly what I feared you would do.

My body froze and my heart was beating so loud. The fear I felt froze every inch of my body. But you didn’t even hesitate.

I can forgive everything and I don’t want to hurt you back – I just want to get away from that suffocating powerless feeling that haunts me every second of every fucking moment of every fucking day. The feeling that no matter how much I tried to get you to stop, you didn’t. You crushed my most sacred boundary.

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