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Say no because you respect and value yourself

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I have begun practicing saying no and being clear with my limits. Today someone came to me and he was really rude. In the beginning of the conversation I told him what the original plan was, and what my part in the project was. I was clear and confident because I knew all the fact, all the rules and all the expectations with this project. He did not accept the facts, he lied straight into my face and got angry. He asked me to change the project completely, just to fit his needs, which basically meant that he would not participate at all, yet be payed as if he had done all the work. I said no, and I explained the situation, the rules with the project that we had to do. He got even more upset when I didn´t do what he wanted me to do and he started questioning me. At this point the conversation felt really uncomfortable. I told him that he made me feel very uncomfortable, and that I didn’t want to help him anymore – I asked him to leave and get someone else to help him instead. He did not take my no, he got even more angry. But when he noticed that I was not going to give in, he stood up and left.

When I spoke to my friends about what had happened, they told me that this was not the first time this person had acted in that way. All my friends had experienced similar situations with this person.

The entire situation felt really weird and I am so proud of myself for not letting him have his way with me. I know what is right and I know what is wrong. I will never do what feels wrong to me in order to please someone else. It doesn´t matter who they are. I will no longer bend over backwards for others, I will respect and value myself just as much as I respect and value our differences. I don’t judge this person, I just choose to remove myself from this person and hope that he finds a way to deal with his own insecurities.

 

  • Have you found yourself in a situation where someone tried to cross a boundary with you? How did you handle the situation?

 

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