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I felt like a fragile bunny that the hunter was just about to shoot with his gun

A no is a no. And no, it doesn’t matter that you have an amazing figure. No, it doesn’t matter that your clothes are sexy and tight. No, it doesn’t matter that you know the person. No, it doesn’t matter that no one else saw it or heard it. A no is a fucking no.

You looked at me and I begged you to stop. I felt like a fragile bunny that the hunter was just about to shoot with his gun. My heart was beating so fast and so loud. I tried to get away, I begged you to stop, I said no, I reached for your hands and tried to pull them away from my body… but you grabbed them firmly and as I contined to beg you not to do it, you took your big cold hand and placed it firmly over my mouth… and with the other hand you did exactly what I feared you would do. You were too strong. I had no chance.

You didn’t listen to my no, you didn’t care that my body was scared to death, you didn’t mind hurting me in order to satisfy your burning desire for more.

Why did you ignore me when I begged you not to do it? Why cannot limits be respected? You said; because my body was so irresistable. So curvy, so sexy, so hot that you just had to do it. Is that a valid excuse? Does it make it all ok? No. A no is a fucking no.

But that was then, this is now. I am alive. No one can ever hurt me so much that my love and zest for life goes away. I am stronger. I will never let anyone or anything dim my light. I am not broken – just temporarily off my balance.

Because of this I will shine even brighter one day and feel even more free and empowered. I truly believe that everything that happens to you can be a source of inspiration for you to now become the best, most good-feeling and empowered version of you. Just allow yourself the time you need to heal first. One step at a time.

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22 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Gaz
    Mar 28, 2019 @ 22:56:43

    You’re an amazing person. No always means no. I hope this person is somewhere where he can no longer hurt you or anyone else.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  2. The Lovegood Oddity
    Mar 28, 2019 @ 23:08:34

    No means no! 10 years later I’m still healing. But stronger than ever. May your strength and courage help heal you. I stand with you sister.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  3. Marty
    Mar 28, 2019 @ 23:37:20

    Sorry you had to
    Experience this trauma

    Women get ptsd twice as often as men except when we go to war.

    You have survived and lead others to follow your example of not giving up.

    Now I can see where that anger originated from.

    It is a hard path to let go, to risk again and be vulnerable

    You have strength and willpower

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  4. The V Pub
    Mar 28, 2019 @ 23:47:47

    He was a monster. My thoughts go to you, hoping for your healing ❀️

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  5. jesusluvsall
    Mar 29, 2019 @ 01:41:37

    I admire how you are overcoming the terrible trauma. Praying for your continued healing. I am glad you will not allow the violence of that man dim your light.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  6. Deborah
    Mar 29, 2019 @ 04:09:20

    Not. Your. Fault.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  7. a quiet man
    Mar 29, 2019 @ 05:13:02

    Your words are strong – always informative

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  8. ashleyleia
    Mar 29, 2019 @ 10:18:13

    You have an amazing ability to turn adversity into growth and healing. Your babies are so lucky to have you.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  9. Jonathan
    Mar 29, 2019 @ 14:12:34

    I met up with a group of bloggers last night – and the girls in the group all told the same stories about dealing with harassment and abuse of trust on a daily basis. It makes you doubt the entire world.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  10. bigskybuckeye
    Mar 30, 2019 @ 15:01:57

    A true gentleman respects a women in an honest and genuine way. May God continue to bless you and heal you.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  11. jupitergrant
    May 14, 2019 @ 18:25:23

    No means no. There are unfortunately some who are deaf to no. I’m very sorry πŸ’

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

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