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Take responsibility for how you feel?

“It is not you, it is me” – yes!!!! It is never the other person´s thoughts, words or actions that affect how you feel about them or about yourself – it is your own thoughts, words and actions that affect how you feel about them and yourself.

No one else can make you feel this way or that way without your consent – you are the one who chooses the perspective from which you view everything! So yes, you are actually in charge of how you feel and yes you are the only one who can change how you feel.

Of course others can inspire you to feel a certain way because of their actions and words – but ultimately you are the one who chooses. That is very empowering and very freeing to realize!

Now this is actually rather deep even though it seems so simplistic. One might argue that because of their partner`s actions they were left heart broken and insecure. True, it might feel that way. But, you can work on how you view what happens. Take cheating for example. Instead of letting it break you, you work on looking at it as an act from someone who didn´t really love you – then it is a good thing that you were made aware of this action so you can be more clear about what kind of relationship you want to be in. Do you really want to be with someone who hurts you? Is that really love? Perhaps you want to be with this person anyway and perhaps this action made this person more aware of how he/she wants to feel about you and how he/she wants your relationship to be like.

It is true that only good can come from any experience, but what is important is how you view what happened and the perspective you now choose to have. And you are in charge of that.

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